Move Your Assana Along

What's with everybody chillaxing in supta baddha konasana (reclined cobbler's pose) before class?

Stilling your mind?

You do know that you can do this while you practice?

In fact, it's what you should be doing while you practice (breathe, focus, quiet the mind).

Pre-class time is a great opportunity to work into your problem areas. Especially if it's the only asana you'll be practicing for the day.

And keep in mind that there's no guarantee that class will include your weak areas.

Check out all the 'advanced' yogis. Are they lying in supta baddha konasana? No.

Hmmm...maybe there's something in this pre-class stuff.

You better check it out, J.

Real Yoga Etiquette

Yeah, yeah, like we are gonna turn up to class all smelly,

...or we are gonna openly stare at the yoga supermodel bending into a pretzel,

... ...or we are gonna leave before savasana.

... ... ... yada, yada

B...O...R...I...N...G etiquette.

Listen up yoga peeps...here's the real deal...

REAL YOGA ETIQUETTE

Where to look

Don't look at anybody for the duration of class...your visual focus should be on a point on the floor, wall or ceiling depending on the pose. And when on the mat, you are always in a pose. This includes pre-class, warm-up.

Because your focus is always on the floor, wall or ceiling, there's no way you can catch anybody's eye, to ask a question or something equally silly.

Store your questions / comments and look it up later, or catch up with whomever after class. If it's that important, it'll still be around then.

The only time to make eye contact, is with the teacher after they say Namaste (they will look around the class). Smile and mouth thanks.

How to move

Think about what the physical benefits of yoga are:

strength + flexibility + balance + agility = grace. 

So try to move gracefully, no straining, grunting, groaning or labored breath.

Think about what you look like in somebody else's peripheral vision. Say what?

Yep...weird, I know. But in your fellow student's peripheral vision, when they see you...

....are they seeing choppy, zig zaggin' spasms that make them lose focus and look at you?

...or are you moving so deliberately, with practiced intention, that it just looks like somebody moving to a melody in the distance?

You should be gently, helping and coaxing them into the pose with your melodic movement in their peripheral. It's a dance. If you start dancing so will they.

From the moment you walk into the practice area until you walk back out again, move with grace.

No fidgeting

You usually get the option to get it out of your system on the first down dog. After that it's all yoga business... get into the pose and be still. 

Now, we talked about grace before. And there's a natural grace of movement while in a pose.

Say you are in warrior 2. In time with your breath, on your inhales, rise slightly (imperceptibly). On your exhales, slowly sink in deeper. It's a dance and you are the swan.

Your slight up and down movement, in time with your breath, will encourage others to be calm and breathe.

This is as opposed to the person swingin' their arms about or gawking down at their feet or anywhere else (remember those focal points we were talking about). 

Now this even includes when the teacher asks everyone to look at their feet to check their foot positioning. Yep, the cool kids know if their feet are in the right spot or not. 

No need to be checking up on yourself and interrupting your focus. Don't believe me? 

Watch the old hands the next time the teacher asks everyone to 'check up' on themselves. Betcha they don't look down.

Ok, that's enough etiquette for now. Be quiet, move gracefully (which means no fidgeting as well).

Pretty simple eh?

Practicing this way, helps you and helps others.

Peace out, J.

The "A" Word: When You Know You're No Longer A Yoga Newbie

So you've got 200 pairs of leggings, know the Sanskrit name of ALL the poses and have 200,000 followers on insta where you post yoga pics.

The yoga teacher knows you by name, and s/he has even got you to demo a couple of times.

Are you a yoga newbie?

Nope, sounds like you've been around a while, so not a newbie.

Are you an advanced yogi?

Whoa...not so fast with the 'A' word speedy...let's step this through...

Advanced Asana

Let's say you can put your foot/feet behind your head, can hold a freestanding handstand and can drop back into full wheel. So yeah, you are pretty bendy and strong.

But before we go throwing around the 'A' word...

How's your breathing? Your focus while in these advanced poses?

If you are straining like hell to hold the pose and can only think of getting to the time where the teacher tells you to come out of the pose, then no, you aren't practicing advanced asana.

Keep at it some more.

Advanced Practice

So now you can do all the 'advanced' asanas easily. Your breathing is long and deep and your focus is steadily on your drishti (focal point). Sounds like you have it all nailed. 

How's your focus between poses? What happens to it when you fall out of a pose? Do you lose your breathing? Has your mind jumped to analyzing what went wrong with the pose?

If you can't remain focussed when transitioning or when you fall out of a pose, then maybe your practice isn't as advanced as it could be. 

The interesting thing about having an advanced practice, is that you could do it on DAY ONE if you;

• adhere to the current limitations of your body (this isn't playing it safe, it's knowing where your edge is),
• keep your breathing even and deep, and
• maintain your focus for the duration of the class.

Advanced Yogi

By now you should know where I'm gonna go with this...yep...takin' it to real life. 

You can maintain your focus, and observe your emotions during the trials and tribulations of class, without reacting to them. But what about in real life?

Can you observe your emotions and choose what you react to?

Funny how being an advanced yogi isn't measured by what you do on the mat.

Keep practicing, and let's not be so quick to use the 'A' word, J.

A Yogi, A Rabbi And A Monkey Walk Into A Bar

They all say ouch! (Walk into a bar...ouch!...get it?...sigh..whatever).

NEMESIS YOGA: What To Do Until The Cortisone Kicks In

If you haven't had a yoga injury that sidelines your fave - at the moment - pose then it sounds like you're not trying hard enough. Get back in there and crush that sucker.

Jokin' aside, yoga injuries are a reality for us goal oriented westerners. Now don't go gettin' on your yogic moral high horse about Ahimsa (non-violence - to the self included) and other yogic principles.

We are westerners, and it's gonna take a while for this yoga stuff to sink in. Plus, we have a whole culture working against us. The folks in India, back in the day, weren't gettin' bombarded with advertisements 24/7. So give us a break. Whatever.

Where were we? Ah, yes, you've injured yourself doing your fave yoga move...so what are you gonna practice now? You guessed it...your most hated yoga pose aka...

NEMESIS YOGA

Nemesis yoga is usually the way your body doesn't want to bend. For us bros it's usually hip opening or back bending, with our fave yoga revolving around strength poses like arm balances.

Sure there's other things to practice while you are recovering, but that is 'the stuff in the middle' which is B...O...R...I...N...G...pasty vanilla yoga. Yuck.

Here's how you turn the negative of practicing nemesis yoga in a positive...

You know how pissed you are, that that press handstand, that was coming along nicely, thank you very much, is now sidelined - until the cortisone kicks in. Well take that ball of negative energy and sick it onto your nemesis yoga.

Remember when you were younger and your boy/girlfriend broke up with you? And then you re-wrote  that break up in your mind, so it was the other person's fault? Same yogic principle applies here...

Rewrite the injury in your mind, so that nemesis yoga was the cause of your injury. This will help you focus that anger onto nemesis yoga.

And notice how we used the word 'focus', in that last sentence, which is very yogic of us. So we must be doing it right. This will give you the motivation to attack nemesis yoga.

After a couple of weeks of focusing on nemesis yoga, things start to loosen up a bit, and it becomes less nemesis. Which is good...

...good that a couple of weeks are up, not that nemesis yoga is getting better (who give a flying fig about that).

The GOOD news is that your injury is gettin' better and you can start getting back into the good yoga. Woo hoo.

Kirk out.

ONLY Ego And Competitive Spirit Leads To Yogic Enlightenment

Gotta move, gotta move.

It's late, hopefully I'll nail this the first time. Let's see...

You know how your yoga teacher is always banging on about not letting your ego come into your yoga practice. How you are not supposed to compete or compare.

Well I'm calling BULLSHIT. 

You should be trying as hard as you can, to get as good as you can, as fast as you can.

And if that involves comparison and you 'silently' competing...so much the better. GO FOR IT.

Surround yourself with mirrors. Get a goddamn selfie stick and take umpteen gazillion pictures and post them for the world to see how good you are.

Not only that...do it every damn day. Every minute of every damn day. Live, breathe, eat, crap and piss asana.

Do it incessantly, day in, day out. Post those pics. Get better. Make people envious. Revel in their praise. Gorge on it. Get better.

Tick every asana box...

Press handstand CHECK.

Urdhva dropbacks CHECK.

Full hanuman CHECK.

Full hanuman in handstand, drop back, put your front foot behind your head and arch back and catch your back foot in your mouth.

BIG 

FAT

C...H...E...C...K

You are IT and a bit. Keep going. Get even better.

Year after year, keep at it. Get so good, you make yourself sick, you are so 'sick' at asana.

Let everyone eat your dust. Let them fade to nothing in the rear view of your asana mirror. Be relentless. Practice more. Get even better.

Get drunk on asana. Puke asana, then drink some more. Cut yourself and bleed asana.

Be so far ahead of the pack, that nothing they could possibly do, could come even remotely close to matching your god/dess like asana abilities.

You're not gonna stop, but if you stopped now, and everyone else practiced every second, of every day, for their whole lives, on the day you die, you would still be better than every freakin' one of them.

Forget about everyone else not being in your league...They aren't even in your UNIVERSE.

Not even in your universe. Practice more. Bend. Stretch.  Breathe. Better.

Just you and your asana. So far ahead. So much practice.

No one can, or ever will compare. Stretch.

They can't compare. Inhale.

No need to compare. Exhale.

How to Live to be 104 Years Old - or your Money Back

I have an incurable disease. It's called Ankylosing Spondylitis. Massive amounts of excruciating pain occurs in my hips and spine, brought on by equally massive amounts of inflammation.

The body combats this inflammation by depositing calcium in the inflamed joints, until they fuse together. Usually, with a bent over or hunched back.

Why am I telling you this sad tale of my woes.

So You Will Listen.

What if I told you that even though Western medicine - arguably the most advanced trauma medicine in the world - was wrong. That there actually is a cure for this disease, and that I cured myself. Pretty weird eh? 

How did I achieve this miracle?

Through Diet

Yes, the answer to a supposedly incurable disease lies in diet. 

I've told you all this so that you listen to me and don't think I don't know what I'm about.

Here's what you need to know if you want to live to be 104 years old...

1. Don't eat sugar. Eat honey.
2. Don't drink alcohol. Alcohol is like sugar.
3. Don't smoke.
4. Don't eat dairy.
5. Don't eat eggs.
6. Don't eat gluten.
7. Don't eat red meat (pork, lamb, goat, beef).

That's it folks. You have the knowledge to attain a ripe old age (or your money back).

Kirk out.

P.S. In the interests of full disclosure, I do sometimes eat red meat, so subtract 20 from the 104.

Amazing Secret that Makes 50 the New 40

One of the biggest factors used to determine a person’s age is the way they move. 

Hunched over and shuffling = old person. 

A lot of people around age 50 hit the gym or start running, in an attempt to keep themselves young. 

Errr…not going to work. 

Pumping iron and running do nothing for the way you move. Let me explain...

I was first introduced to the concept of movement and ageing on my first visit to a spa in the  Czech Republic.

In a place full of stiff, Ankylosing Spondylitis sufferers, one Dutch guy stood out. He moved free and easy. He looked young compared to the rest of us, even though we were all of the same vintage. 

That’s when I started to notice postures.

Fast forward six years, and guaranteed anybody who tries to guess my age or finds out my age, 

always assumes that I’m anywhere from 10 - 15 years younger. 

Remember, I too was one of the shuffling dead at one point. So what has made me appear younger to everyone else…

yoga. 

Yep, yoga has one goal: 

To make your body move freely so that you can sit still and concentrate (meditate). 

Talk about contradictory!

Yoga is good for:

#1. Concentration: You simply can’t stand in balancing postures if you can’t concentrate.

#2. Strength: I used to weigh 200 pounds (95kg) with a 300 pound bench press (140kg). I now weigh 154 pounds (70kg) and would say pound for pound, I’m stronger now than then. Sure, I can’t bench 225 pounds (the 154 pound equivalent of 300 pounds) but then I couldn’t press handstand either.

#3. Balance.

#4. Agility

Put all these qualities together, and you end up with a certain grace and freedom in movement, which is interpreted by others as being younger - much younger. 

Namaste, J